10 Ways To Stop Self Sabotaging Habits

Most people have good intentions for themselves. At least, when asked, they want to be successful. However, not everyone is successful; not because we do not know the right things to do but often because we continue in habits, thoughts, beliefs, emotions and ways of doing things that are self-sabotaging. These, therefore, lead to a sequence of repeated habits with the same pitiful results
Self-sabotage, while it should be strange, happens more often than not. Reasons range from not truly wanting to be successful or change to preferring the familiarity of ‘failure’ than the fear of the unknown in success. Other reasons include;

But I do nothing upon myself, and yet I am my own executioner. – John Donne

To overcome your self-sabotaging habit, you will need to identify it, understand how it has affected you or how it manifests and replace it with  a new empowering habit. Strategies for doing this will vary depending on the self-sabotaging habit. Below are a couple ways to overcome these self-sabotaging habits.

a. Ignorance; not knowing what to do will often cause one to self-sabotage. One way to address this in business is to get as much information  as possible, and training where relevant, to ensure you have the knowledge and skills necessary to be successful in a venture. Training can be through working in the targeted sector or getting formal learning.

b. Another way to address this is to explore life. Develop a passion for things that do not fit within your comfort zone. You will find there is a lot that could pique your interest and creativity.

c. The need to be in control;  in the process of wanting to be in control we self-sabotage. Not everything can really be controlled especially when dealing with people. Humans are complex and have varied nuances. When working with people give a level of freedom for individuals to do what they are good at instead of controlling their actions.

d. Be open to new ways: Also, understand that while there are some habits that lead to success, strategies to success are not fixed especially in today’s’ information age. Be open to new ways of doing things and information that will help you develop new strategies.

e.  Adrenalin rush; A need for excitement can cause people to behave in a way that undermines their relationships or progress. For instance, in the middle of an office party or game people may get moody, fight or drink too much. Self-control is crucial to managing such self-damaging habits. Observe how you behave in different circumstances so you know what to do to avoid behaving in a manner that is self-sabotaging

f. Feeling unworthy; if an individual has grown up being told about their shortcomings they may find it difficult to accept that the new life is part of us. This can lead one to keep doing things that undermine them.

This is one reason (among others) that lottery winners and people who get rich suddenly (sports stars and politicians) pretty much loose their wealth immediately after they have made it. You can address this by developing new habits and self-confidence that will enable You have a new perspective of yourself and understand you deserve the best just as the next person does.

g. Being a perfectionist; Some people want everything perfect and spend a lot of time perfecting new products or processes before taking them to market.

While having quality processes and products is good it does not always work for you to spend time perfecting something before taking it to market. In fast moving industries (e.g. IT) you could miss the opportunity to sell the product while trying to perfect it or it may be totally surpassed by events and not even get to launch.

h. Giving up before starting; Research and experiences from others can give information that may discourage one from continuing on a course of action thus an excuse not to proceed. A self-sabotaging individual will often look for information that is negative and quickly back off as soon as they get even mildly discouraging data.

If your tend to do this, how about looking for supporting data as well and making a decision based on both positive and negative information for a realistic view? This reduces the risk of failure. Having decided on what to do keep it in mind and get more information that supports your moving ahead in the direction you choose.

i. Contentedness; when you focus on only what you need and are quickly satisfied and not ambitious, you will quickly meet your needs and have no reason to keep striving for further success. One may also do this because they do not want to stick out or be different from their peers. This is a very content self-sabotaging habit.

Address this by think beyond yourself. Being successful benefits not only you but others that are around you and the community at large. It means jobs for others if you are in business, provision for families and generally, a better community. If you have no other reason to stop self-sabotage, do it to encourage others and because other people will benefit as part of your success.

j. Mental health;  The most important thing you need to address is the status of your mind. Take time to think through where you are at and take care of yourself. Stress can lead to you to indulging in many more self-defeating habits than when you are both mentally and physically healthy.

Below is a further list of ways we self-sabotage. The above strategies will work for some and you may need to come up with new strategies that work specifically for you.

  1. Autopilot Behavior
  2. Avoiding taking risks
  3. Avoiding making mistakes
  4. Being a pessimist
  5. Comparing oneself to others
  6. Complaining
  7. Failing to take action
  8. Fear of failure
  9. Inability to say “no”
  10. Lack of creative thinking
  11. Lack of critical thinking
  12. Lack of a structured way of making decisions
  13. Not having a birds eye view on issues
  14. Not being humble
  15. Not listening
  16. Not planning
  17. Not addressing stress
  18. Personal Martyrdom
  19. Procrastination
  20. Perfection
  21. Refusing to be helped
  22. Self-imposed isolation
  23. Self harm
  24. Spending too much
  25. Worry
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  • Annabel Onyando

    The goal is impactful articles. If my words touch you; Africans of all creed and colour all over the world, and help you grow, then my work is done. Because media changes lives

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